Huvud

The speech of the Archbishop

(The spoken version shall take precedence)

To live a good life, you must be allowed to take responsibility, to have an influence.
 
We wish each of us the possibility of making our way through life successfully and of having control over our lives.
Your situation, Crown Princess Victoria and Prince Daniel (we can now use this title for the first time), is both shared and unique. You'll be taking on tasks that you won't be able to turn down — but that you can influence. One of you has had many years to prepare for and live this life — and one of you only a few. You won't have complete control over your lives — but you will successfully make your way through life if you keep your focus on people other than yourselves, on wider contexts, on society, on family and on the future. "Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ."

We wish each of us the possibility of being needed and useful.
There are several stages of usefulness. Each individual needs to think several steps ahead. What will be the consequences of this choice or that choice? What am I capable of — and what should I do even though I wonder whether I can actually do it? None of us is indispensable, not even a crown princess or a prince. But we are still needed. We can all be called into question, not least if we are public figures. Criticism costs nothing, not even when it's spiteful. But we all still need to try to make a positive contribution using our talents.

Your usefulness in major contexts will perhaps be clearest when you can stand up for important values that are under threat, such as gratitude, a sense of belonging during crises and losses, hopefulness in troubled times, and indignation about and commitment to combating breaches of human rights. Your significance to loyalty and fellowship in society, with free scope for true, vital democracy and debate, may be great.

At the same time, you can easily be reduced to people who add sparkle to an event, or to lowest common denominators. A great deal may be expected of you that fundamentally does not seem that important to you. May you in such cases be able to maintain your curiosity and enthusiasm!
 
So, you are now husband and wife. Privately, you have set up a 'refuge' that has now been confirmed as publicly as is possible. Through marriage, a bridge is forged between the most personal side of your lives and the public side. "Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate." We who all over world are following your wedding are responsible for helping you with this. We have prayed for you, we will carry on praying for you and thinking of you, and will help you to stay together — in the same way as we have done at all other weddings we have been to, and will attend in the future!
 
Within the family, space can be made for openness and reciprocity that could never be accommodated in public life, with its pressure to perform. Within the family you have each other, because you love each other and want this sense of belonging together to form a reliable and steadfast foundation for your lives. You do not need to prove anything to each other — but you do need to focus on each other. "Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves. Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn."
 
We wish each of us the possibility of being carried and of accepting help.
Independence, self-determination and freedom are important concepts. Nobody should need to crawl; nobody should need to be subservient. Feeling that you´re in someone's debt is difficult.

Being the underdog means being on shaky ground if you cannot trust the other person. In society at large and in public life, this is often the reality. In a close relationship, when everything works out as we wish, things are different. Mutual, secure, loving dependence on the other person gives us a sense of well-being. This is what the two of you are experiencing. May your refuge remain free and protected, but still welcoming for those you hold dearest!
 
And a lifetime can be long. A strong person can become weak, and a person born weak can become strong. This is something you will have to deal with in your family. A person who feels secure has the courage to be carried!

In a close and trusting relationship, you can pray together and individually. Use this power!

"... love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God." God manifests Himself through love. And, according to our faith, he also manifests Himself to those who do not believe they know God!
 
We wish each of us the possibility of getting a second chance when we fall short.
I do not believe that anyone lives up to what he or she would ideally like to live up to. We all have our shortcomings. The excellent ethical principles of loving your neighbour as yourself and doing to others what you would have them do to you are beautiful, but they´re difficult. Sometimes, when you look at all your shortcomings, the self-contempt becomes overwhelming.
 
You are now married. You have come so close to each other that you know that your love is mutual and that you have the capacity to forgive each other. This means that your love for each other can also accommodate failure and weakness!

You have not done anything to deserve life. Nobody has. It is given to us. The air, the existence of the universe and relative equilibrium, memories and hopes. It is given to us by God, who wants good things for us. The God of Love. Through what Jesus did for us, we know that God forgives and believes that we deserve to live and get another chance, even though we fall short!
 
We wish each of us the possibility of making our way through life successfully and of having control over our lives. We wish each of us the possibility of being needed and useful. We wish each of us the possibility of being carried and of accepting help. We wish each of us the possibility of getting a second chance when we fall short. We wish the two of you all this!
 
"I pray that [the Father] out of his glorious riches ... may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. Stand firm and be constantly rooted in him."